"One fun fact I learned while on the air with Keith Olbermann was that humans on the Internet are scumbags. People say children are cruel, but I was never made fun of as a child or an adult. Suddenly, my disability on the world wide web is fair game. I would look at clips online and see comments like, "Yo, why’s she tweakin?" "Yo, is she retarded?" And my favorite, "Poor Gumby-mouth terrorist. What does she suffer from? We should really pray for her." One commenter even suggested that I add my disability to my credits: screenwriter, comedian, palsy."
Maysoon Zayid on TEDWomen (x)
I went to an Arab-American comedy night and there was a Muslim guy making a joke about being in high school football.
"I was hit so hard, I saw Jesus. Do you know how hard you have to be hit to see somebody else’s god?"
This is what jokes about religion are supposed to look like.
- “Why don’t you talk to anyone?”
- “You’re awkward.”
- “Why are you so quiet?”
- “Why would you say that?”
- “Why don’t you talk to them yourself?”
- “Calm Down.”
- “Why are you scared of people?”
- “Why did you do that?”
- “You’re embarrassing yourself.”
- “You’re making a scene.”- “You should try and make friends.”
hello 911? somebody reblogged my post on tumblr.com and said “i cant breathe”. i think i killed someone. i would like to turn myself in
This was a crazy pigeon that was pestering a cat, but I want to believe there are flying cats in Russia.
(via Barselonna) On a side note, you suck at cat, cat.
The cool thing is that in the first photo, the wings not only match in colour, but look as if they’re be the perfect size for a winged cat.